saturday, the first one in may. which could only mean it's kentucky derby day. mint juleps. chicks with silly hats. and three hours of television programming all to show a two minute horse race. you'd think that, given the present state of our economy, advertisers would be hard to find, so they'd eliminate all the mindless hoopla and just broadcast four minutes. ok, i'll give em half an hour. don't need three hours, that's for sure.
right now they're talking to jerry jones. for tracie and the rest that don't look around very much, who think michael jordan is an actor, jerry jones is the owner of the dallas cowboys. (they're a football team, tracie.) and i guess some sort of tornado struck his cowboy's practice facility and some damage done and some minor injuries. i'm sorry for that. but not a fan of jerry jones nor the dallas cowboys. let's get on with the race, already.
i'm not much of a follower of the sport. i most always watch it. but i don't read much of the pre-race hype. for betting purposes, and our betting is merely for bragging rights among the family, when the telecast first came on i made my pick. i've selected desert party. when i selected this fine filly, or maybe she's a stud instead, i don't know, but when i selected desert party odds were 15-1. i figure i'd be happy with a fifteen million dollar return on my million dollar bet. hopefully they'll accept my powerball ticket in lieu of a million bucks cash. surely it's a winner. hmmm, wait. give me a minute.
ok, i'm back. just called my bookie. actually, i called my daughter adri. she lives in vegas. she's putting a million bucks down on desert party to win. i don't have a million bucks. and neither does she. but i told her to to stop at circle k on the way and buy a one dollar lottery ticket. then when she places the bet to explain to the cashier that the ticket's a million dollar winner. i'll be really mad if that lottery ticket turns out to be a fifty million dollar winner and i only realize 15 million from my million dollar bet. a safer bet would be that the casino won't accept the lottery ticket for a million dollar bet. or a one dollar bet either. short of that, i'm putting five bucks on desert party (or was that dessert party? that would be sweet. just saw it flash on the screen. now that i think about it, maybe i didn't look closely enough. either way, a five dollar win ticket will pay me seventy-five bucks or more. unless i'm wrong and the fickle filly doesn't win. or the stupid stud. whichever it would be.